How Bizzare
by xx strawberrylube xx
Summary: Our first story! Level of suckyness: Possible high. Everyone knows a day at the Academy is odd and boring, but that was just the beginning! Yaoi, fluffiness, pervertedness, and randomness GALORE! SasuNaru, KakaIru, and more to come!
1. Balancing Pencils and Speeches, Oh My!

**How Bizarre**

**By: xx strawberrylube xx**

Quelz- YAY! Our first fanfic! - Most happiness! Kairee-san sends her joy 'n all and her best wishes to this fanfic! We just hope this is a boom, not a bust… ; Quick shout-out-er to our beta-buddy, Junsui- Thanks! And. uh…here we go!

Disclaimer- We do not own Naruto, though we can dream, right? We don't own the song "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts" by Monty Python, and we don't own Junsui, but we kinda slave her…-; the only thing we own is this fanfic and the thoughts going into it! …And this here, piece-a gum: Holds up gum:

**BREAK**

It was a peaceful and uneventful day in Konoha - well as peaceful and uneventful as it gets with Naruto around, that is. All of the Genin were at the Academy because it was 'Parent Day'…Anyways; they wanted everyone to know what their parents did, and what they wanted to be when they grow to be big, strong, helpful ninjas. Or, at least, that's what the Jounin and Chuunin wanted them to do.

Naruto was bored beyond belief, and just the thought of people coming in and telling what they did for money bored him twice as much. "I hope this thing is the least bit interesting…like having a parent that's in the circus!" Naruto giggled, as he thought of some old-fart on a unicycle and having him fall off to be rushed to the hospital for spleen surgery, which was very odd... He looked at the clock from where he was sitting, which read '9:47' and sighed. He had the rest of today to put up with.

Sasuke was having a _bit_ of a similar day, but at the same time, completely different. He was swarmed by crazed fan-girls and was trying _not_ to think about this burdened day - the only thing related to Naruto's was that he was bored. As he made way around the corner to his class, the massive blob of girls thinning, he caught glimpse of Naruto balancing a pencil on the bridge of his nose with a bored expression on his face, leaning his chair on the back two legs.

"Naruto-baka, what are you doing?"

This caught Naruto off guard, scaring him enough to knock his chair back. "S-Sasuke? What do you want?" he said slowly as he unsteadily got to his feet and picked up the spilled chair.

Sasuke made his way toward the blonde (the boy-crazy girls that were standing at the door had finally realized they had to go to class) "Well, Naruto, it's a free village; I may do as I please."

Naruto glared at the teme for a second and snapped, "What do you want? It better be good, or leave me alone."

The older boy flipped his long bangs out of his eyes swiftly. "Naruto, lose the attitude, or I'll have to hurt you."

The blonde jerked his head up, "What're you gonna do, eh? Rape me?" Sasuke said nothing but smirked, which sent a shiver down Naruto's spine. "Don't you have to go to _class_, Sasuke-teme?" It hadn't occurred to him he had to be in class three minutes ago.

"Hn…Who cares? It's just a bunch of old bags telling whatever they want us to listen to."

Just as the older teen finished his 'speech', Rock Lee ran over and nearly screamed, "OH, JOY, JOY, JOY! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE LOVELY PEOPLE TELLING ABOUT THEIR LOVELY CAREERS!" Sasuke twitched; Naruto nearly pissed himself in fear. Lee continued his little rant, "AREN'T YOU EXCITED? I'M JUST _SO _EXCITED!"

Sasuke winced at the sight of the overjoyed boy jump and giggle. Naruto finally piped up, "Lee…get a room…" The poor 'happy-man' was suddenly saddened and very dramatically ran off with his hands over his water-filled eyes to tell on them to Gai-sensei.

Finally, Kakashi-sensei arrived calmly into the classroom. "…Well, hello, class! It was such a fine day this morning; I thought to take a small walk to the park…"

Naruto cut him off before he could say anymore "LIES!" he exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger at the one-eyed man. Sasuke decided it was a good time to get to his class. He got up and glared at the sensei, then took his leave.

The teacher smiled at the Genin as he left, then turned to the class and said, "As most of you know its 'Parent Day'; where everyone's parents come into class and explain what they do as their jobs, and help you decide what you would like to be when you grow up!"

Naruto was suddenly melancholy; he had said '_everyone_'s parents' were to come to class… but just as soon as his depressed feelings started they ended; Kakashi said quite loudly, "First I'll let the parents into the class, and then we can get started!"

He opened the door and a handful of adults waltzed into the room. The last parent to come in was…a bit odd… It was clear he was, at the least, a relative of Lee, for he had those big, bulgy eyes... He had a pink nametag on his shirt, but the writing was too big and curvy for Naruto to read.

Once again, Kakashi-sensei spoke up, "Class, welcome our guests!"

The only 'welcoming' was grunts, forced smiles, and –of course by Naruto- a loud "HIYA!"

The grey-haired man sat on his desk and said, "Class, before you meet the parents, we'd like for all of you to share!" With that, he gave his trademark one-eyed smile. Lee's hand immediately shot up and waved it impatiently. Kakashi looked around the room in desperate attempt to find someone to go besides Lee, but came out empty-handed.

In a bored tone, he called the spiffy Lee to the front of the room. Lee ran up and jumped to stop himself from crashing into the black board; causing a loud crack of noise. Quickly he turned around to face the class and opened his mouth to begin his –most likely hour long- speech, when there was a knock at the door.

"COME IN," Rock Lee said happily to the door, putting his speech on hold for his manners. The sensei was a bit confused but said, "Err…yes. Come in." The door slowly opened to see the famous, bored Sasuke-kun. He glanced around at the room at the closest faces staring at him –either in awe or curiosity-

"Uh…Ibiki-sensei…" He looked around to see if it was all right to call him that when he was not present. "He told me to come in here for the Parent-snooze 'cause his class is full…"

The teacher didn't catch his insult to this traditional day, but said, "Very well! Err…" he looked around for an empty seat, and found one next to Naruto, and pointed it out for him. "Right here, sit so we can let Rock Lee start. We're telling the class and parents what we want to be before we start with the parents." Sasuke followed directions and took his seat next to Naruto with an "Hn".

Lee decided to take the moment to his advantage and said, "Well, when I grow up I want to go to- no…uhm…I want to be a…SHOWMAN! Yeah! And I'll sell COCONUTS! Like that guy in that one song! Yeah! He's one of my ROLE MODELS! So YOSH! That's what I'm going to do when I grow up!" He punched the air; then moseyed down to his seat.

Kakashi's eye was wide in…whatever his eye was wide in. He had just seen Lee give a speech saying he was to grow up to be like some guy he'd heard of…in a song… Kakashi-sensei, completely forgetting about class, thought to himself, "How did that song go?" Iruka-sensei came into the classroom just as the teacher sang these words to himself, a bit loudly:

"Down at an English fair,

One evening I was there,

When I heard a showman shouting

Underneath the flare:

Hoi've got a lo-ve-ly bunch o' coconuts

There they are a-standin' in a row

Big ones, small ones, some as big as yer 'ead!

Give 'em a twist, a flick o' the wrist,

That's what the showman said!"1

The class and the adults stared at the older man for a second, then Lee and his relative stood up –at the same time- and clapped loudly, followed by Iruka, then the rest of the class slowly clapped, still in shock.

Kakashi-sensei blushed a tad –that bit of his face as you could see, at least- "Uh-uh…thank you? Heh heh...this is a bit embarrassing…!"

Naruto rubbed his eyes to make sure he had just witnessed his something-thousand-year-old teacher just…sing! Sasuke coughed, "Geez, did the old guy just…sing?"

Naruto turned to him and smiled, "YUP! SURE DID! MY EYES AREN'T LYING THIS TIME!" The dark-haired boy just rolled his eyes and turned back to the front of the class.

Kakashi's blush darkened as he realized that one: Naruto and Sasuke were talking about him and two: Iruka was there. "Er-r... we should get on with this, don't you think, class?" he asked unsteadily.

Iruka finally vocalized himself, "Yes! Please do!" The matinee looked around and said, "ANYONE else?" Naruto's hand shot up –almost as fast as Lee's- and Kakashi said, "Okay, Naruto, go on up…"

**STOP THE BREAKING, MAAN**

Quelz- WOOT, WOOT! First chaptahhh…DE-ON-AY! - Please review, 'cause it'll speed up the updating process! Though the next chapter is already done…XDD we did that one before we even THOUGHT about this chapter: slaps cheek: shame, eh? Anyway, please review, so we know if this is a good story or not!

1Lyrics from metrolyrics(dot)com

Junsui Kegasu's BETA Notes: Yay. BETA! Um, um, um…honestly, the most I can say of this is "no comment." My goodness, you two are an acid trip…


	2. The World Is DOMINATED By Prostitutes!

**How Bizzare**

**By: xx strawberrylube xx**

Kairee- We're baack! Yes, another chapter! Aren't you sooooo happy? I am! And of course you are too! Well, we know you're eager to read, so I'll just stop here, and get on with the fic!

Disclaimer- We don't own anything that may be mentioned in this fic, we own the idea for it though… and we wish that we owned Naruto but sadly we don't. It's obvious too 'cause if we did… EVERYONE WOULD BE SCREWING LIKE RAAABBITS! Well, yeah, we don't own. XD

**BREAK**

Naruto walked up to the front and practically yelled, "Well, when I grow up I want to be Hokage!" He sighed and then added, "Until then, though, I need to make money, so I guess I'll have to be a prostitute."

Iruka gave Kakashi a weary glance and whispered harshly, "Is this what you've been teaching them?" Kakashi just grinned.

As Hinata walked up to the front of the room, Naruto returned to his seat. "I would... wo-would li-like to... t-to marry someone ver-ry special to me..." she stuttered while glancing at Naruto and blushed a deep red. Naruto didn't notice though as he was too busy staring at Sasuke with bedroom eyes. Hinata shyly walked back to her seat as Iruka walked to the front of the class.

"Thank you, parents for joining us, today! Err... If you would like please come to the front of the room and announce your job and tell what it does." No one budged. Finally Mr. Lee's _other_ Dad - name unknown - stood up and skipped to the front of the class. "HELLOOO, CHILDREN," he chirped loudly to the class, "My name is-" Someone coughed loudly. "I am Lee's dad and a prostitute, meaning I have sex - in my case with other men - for money! It pays well and puts food on the table for my beautiful Lee." He smiled at Lee, and wiped a tear from his eye as he took his seat; it was _very_ quiet now.

After almost five minutes of uncomfortable silence, Hiashi walked up to the front of the room. "As most of you know, I am Hyuuga Hiashi, and I am Hinata's father. Our clan is the most honorable and our loyalty is the highest," he added a curt nod and went back to his seat.

"Okay, that was kind of awkward and strange..." Naruto commented under his breath. "Damn, I'm horny," mumbled Sasuke. Naruto's head - both of them - shot up.

"What was that, Teme?" Naruto asked with curiosity.

"N-nothing," Sasuke replied quickly as a light pink tinge appeared on his face.

"Fine," Naruto said, trying to discard the strange feeling and trying to un-hornitize himself. Sasuke happened to look down to see Naruto's growing bulge as Naruto tried to push it down, but Sasuke didn't know that...he just thought Naruto was, well, _MASTURBATING_! Naruto noticed his foe staring at _him _and squeaked, "Sasuke-teme! What the hell are you staring at?"

This caught Sasuke off guard. "Nani?"

"You heard me! What the-"

Kakashi cut into their conversation, "Some Ninja-chan need to pay attention to this," he said, looking at Naruto, "so they can get good jobs and not live like a street-rat." With that said, the sensei left with a smile.

Naruto had a confused look on his face as he turned to Sasuke and said, "I think he was making fun of Lee's dad." Sasuke didn't hear him though because he was too busy dealing with _other things_. "Hey, Sasuke-teme, are you listening?" Naruto asked while poking Sasuke repeatedly. "Hn." was the only reply he got.

Iruka noticed the look in Sasuke's eyes and realized that Sasuke must have a crush on Naruto or may even be in love with him! He turned to Kakashi who appeared at his side one again and with concern in voice asked him, "Do you think that maybe Sasuke has hidden feelings for Naruto?" Kakashi just smiled at Iruka with lust in his eye - his other was covered. Iruka gave a lopsided smile and said, "You're a lot of help."

Kakashi's smile grew, "I know." Iruka just sighed, and then noticed that all of the parents just sat patiently in their seats to leave. He stood up and waltzed to the front.

"Okay, parents, you may all go home now. You may take your children too if you like; if not they will stay until I dismiss them." All of the children and their parents rushed out of the room, leaving only Naruto, Sasuke, Kakashi, and Iruka still there. Iruka looked their way and said, "Sasuke, Naruto, come here for a moment please." They complied, and when they got to Iruka, he smiled at them warmly.

Kakashi glanced down at the bulges in their pants and chirped, "Someone is feeling a little _excited_!" Sasuke and Naruto glanced at each other and when their eyes locked, they blushed and quickly looked away. Kakashi chuckled while Iruka just giggled uncontrollably. Kakashi then slung his arm over Iruka's shoulder, and leaned towards him to whisper into his ear, "Why don't we leave these two alone and go make ourselves busy?"

Iruka blushed, and Naruto tilted his head to the side and asked, "Iruka-sensei, are you feeling okay? Your cheeks look kind of red." Sasuke just 'Hn'd even though he was thinking dirty thoughts about him, Naruto, and chocolate syrup.

Kakashi leaned over once again and whispered huskily, "Other things will too after I'm done with you, Iruka-kun" With a squeeze of Iruka's ass, and a lick of his ear, Kakashi walked towards the door. He glanced over his shoulder, grinned, and said, "You know where to find me." With a wink, he left the room. Iruka's blush skyrocketed, and now Naruto was even more confused than before. "Iruka-sensei, are you _sure_ you're not sick?" his voice was laced with curiosity and worry.

"Y-yes, Naruto, I'm just fine!" he answered, his voice a few octaves higher.

"Okay, if you say so," Naruto replied hesitantly with a shrug.

"Now, back to what I was going to say to you before I got _distracted_," Iruka blushed as he said this.

"Yes?" Naruto asked, leaning forward. Sasuke was too lost in his own mind to even hear what Iruka said.

"Well, I'm beginning to think that you two have..._ feelings_ towards each other, and-"

Naruto cut him off, "What kind of feelings?"

Iruka looked Naruto straight in the eye, "Love, Naruto, or possibly only lust, I can't be too sure..."

Naruto blushed and stuttered out, "M-me have feelings f-for Sasuke-teme? Are you cr-crazy, Iruka-sensei?" Sasuke seemed to come back to reality as he heard Naruto's stuttered words.

"You have feelings for me, Dobe?"

Naruto blushed even more, "N-no way, Sasuke-teme! Why w-would I?"

Sasuke just shrugged it off. "Wouldn't mind if you did though..." He added almost inaudibly.

Naruto tried to back away from the teme but Iruka-sensei stopped him and said, "You shouldn't hide your feelings, Naruto-chan" and added a smile. Naruto glanced up at Iruka, and then suddenly blushed. "B-but...I'm afraid that he'll p-push me away..." he bent his head down, and stared at the floor. In a hushed whisper, he added: "and I wouldn't be able to take that..."

**STOP THE BREAKING, MAAN**

There you have it, Chapter 2! He he, kind of cliffhanger-y too, kind of... Yeah, well, review please! If you do, it'll motivate us to update faster, and you probably want that!

**Junsui Kegasu's BETA Notes:** After successfully dividing the gargantuan paragraph into what we call a chapter, I return this to you!


	3. Bold and Delicious!

**How Bizzare**

**By: xx strawberrylube xx**

**Quelz**- :SQWEALS: …Hehe…Heya, people-ness! _WE HAVE REVIEWS!_ Happy-happy, joy-joy! …Oh yeah….Here's chapter 3 up 'n ready for ya! A quick shout out to Junsui, our BETA bud- Thanks _so_ much for BETAing for us, though we have been butts an' all…and trying to get that chapter up didn't work at all that day nor the day after…anyway; thanks for puttin' up with us!

Disclaimer: Don't own. End of story. We don't own Naruto, Junsui, yaoi –if that can be owned-, or anything else. Most importantly we don't own Naruto or any of the characters, 'cause if we did…then…it would be a living _HELL_ for them…but just sayin'. Moral: we don't own SQUAT.

**Warning: this chapter is doomed for angst…but just sayin'**

**BREAK**

Sasuke turned to Naruto and said, "Geez, Dobe, you're acting like Hinata." Iruka looked up and glared slightly at the Uchiha for his insult; Sasuke shrugged.

Naruto quietly spoke up, keeping his head bent. "…Iruka-sensei? Can you…please let go of me…?" Iruka looked down at the blonde, sighed, and let go of his shoulder.

He looked out the window and laughed. "I better get going…or else I'll have an unhappy seme on my rear!" Naruto lifted his head and stared at the sensei in shock.

"…"

"Well, uh…" He coughed. "I…err… See you, Naruto. Sasuke." He lifted his hand and on his heel turned away towards the door.

"Isn't he walking a bit fast…?" Sasuke said to himself, but shrugged it off. "Anyway, Naruto, I'm out. Have'ta get home…Itachi's cooking…"

"Oh. Bye, Sasuke-…" Naruto said, stopping himself from any name-calling, then softly said, "I'll…see you tomorrow…"

Sasuke just said "Hn," then left Naruto to an empty classroom.

After standing in the silence, Naruto sighed, sticking his hand in his pocket in search of some change. "Ramen's always done me good, right?" he said, pulling out enough money for just one small bowl. He thought to himself, '_Geez, I haven't had a small bowl since I was a little kid…_'

Down at Ichiraku's, Naruto sat in his usual seat, but only picking at his dearly beloved. He sighed, staring with little interest at the occasional gathering of noodles, then to be separated by his chopsticks.

The guy at the counter noticed his frequent-customer's odd behavior and asked, leaning on the counter towards him, "Somethin' wrong, kid?"

Naruto quickly looked up in surprise, "E-eh?"

He smiled at the blonde and repeated, "Somethin' wrong wi'cha? You don't look ya' nermal self."

"Oh…sorry, I'm not feeling well…"

"Mm…well, eat up, then get home. Aint'cha parents worried 'bout cha?"

"…My parents…," Naruto stopped himself and looked back into his steaming soup. "…My parents are busy…"

"Oh…sorry'tuh hear that, kid. That's not no fun. I grews up wit' parents workin' all the time, toos..."

Naruto could tell a life's story was about to start, so he thought about other things. '_If Sakura-chan was here, she'd correct him every time he'd say something…anything!' _He could picture it; Sakura standing on the counter, _screaming _at the man about his poor grammar and Sasuke walking off, as if he didn't know the mad woman. He sighed, '_I can't believe I had a crush on her_...'

The bad-grammar man's voice broke his thoughts: "…Then Uncle Chico said,- 'Ay, kid? Are ya' lis'nin'?"

Naruto looked up at him and grinned. "No," he said very bluntly. He finally decided to eat some of his ramen, but as soon as he took three chugs, it was gone. He stared into the empty bowl helplessly. "I, uh, think I should get going…nice talking with ya'." He shook his head, '_Five more minutes, I'd start talking like him_...'

"Oh…okay, kid. See ya soon," he said knowing most of his 'Ramen Schedule', for he'd seen Naruto making one.

"Okay, will do…," Naruto said counting out the amount he needed to pay the man. "Bye!" he said, raising the sheet, used as an entrance, then ran in the direction of his and Iruka's apartment "_Why am I running?_" He thought to himself, "_I'm not in a hurry to get home, am I? No_." The blonde slowed down his pace to a jog. "_Yeah…Better…Just…keep it_…_ slow_..._No rush_," He thought, pacing himself.

Finally, he reached the corner that comes to a four-way pass. "_Straight: home, Left: Kakashi-sensei's place, Right: Sasuke's, Back: the ramen shop and the Academy_," Naruto thought without really realizing it. A moment passed with him stopped staring at the center of the street. He shook his head and said, "I need to talk to him…!" He had never thought of turning a corner could be such a hard decision till now. "_One…two…three…Hyuuga…five_...," he counted, then stopped at 'six'. The black mailbox had 'Uchiha Residence' written on it's side in white. "_Here's my stop_...,"Naruto gulped and took his lead.

Once he had climbed the driveway that seemed miles long, he rang the doorbell. The ring sang it's song: "_Ding, dong, ding, dong_._ Dong, ding, ding, dong!_" Then a tall teen with sharp red eyes opened the large oak door.

"Hello," the teen greeted the guest insecurely, "May I be assistance to you?"

Naruto looked at him strangely, as if he was speaking some alien language. "Uh…yeah, Sasuke here?"

The Sharingan-eyed squealed in delight. "Mm! You must be Naruto! I'm Sasuke-chan's older brother, Itachi," he said, sticking out his hand for Naruto to shake, but he didn't catch the drift. Naruto stood staring at the older teen, still as if he were some foreign creature. Itachi let out more of a huff, than a sigh, "Come in, I'll call down Sasuke-chan." The blonde did as he was told and stood wide-eyed at the beautiful craftsmanship of the building. He had never seen the inside, just the out.

Itachi came around next to him and said, "Yes, it's pretty, but it becomes a bore after a while…" Itachi looked at him and shoved out a hand towards the large fluffy-looking sofas said, "Please, take a seat; he'll be down in a sec."

Naruto plopped down on the love-seat. "_Why do they call it a 'love seat'? I guess it _is_ comfy enough_...," he wondered, slightly bouncing on the cushions. His thoughts were interrupted –which happens a lot, I guess...- by the one and only, Sasuke.

"What are you doing, Naruto?"

'Little Naruto' jumped up, as well as Naruto at the sight of Sasuke out of nowhere. "S-Sasuke-kun…," he said, then looked down and messed with his hands. "I …uh…, wanted to say, I…uh…,"

"Get on with it, Naruto…," Sasuke said impatiently.

Naruto gulped and started again. "I wanted…," he looked up at the older boy, "I do like you, Sasuke-teme…I like you…a lot…"

Sasuke smirked and said, "Whatever…"

The blonde blushed and said softly, "I…better, uh…get home…Thanks for listening Sasuke…" He started heading for the door when he felt a warm hand on his arm. "Eh? Sasu-" His words were cut off by Sasuke's lips.

"I like you a lot, too, Naruto…"

**STOP THE BREAKING, MAAN**

WOOT! That's the end of this chapter! Geez, I really liked this chapter, but at the same time, didn't… It was angst-y and fluff-y…OH WELL! Hope you enjoyed it…! REVIEW:evil laugh, cough:

...Excuse me...BYE PEOPLEZ! Thanks, Aya…I mean, uh…Junsui!


	4. Dreams, Memories, and Countless Regrets

**How Bizarre  
By: xx strawberrylube xx**

**Kairee:** Yay! Here's the fourth chapter! Hope you love it as much as I do! The ideas and stuff for this chapter just would _not _leave me alone, so that's why it's here so…uh, I forgot the word! Oh well, though! It doesn't matter too much! Just enjoy the chapter:smile: **Quelz-** Hey, 'squze the interruption, Kai, but I can't center the title, peeps, so you'll have to do for one chapter! 

**Disclaimer- We don't own, chyeahz. That's pretty much it. Oh, I do own some Naruto DVDs and mangas too, though! Does that count! …Doubt it. Chyeahz, we don't own though!**

**Warning: Contains non-descriptive, and non-really telling anything smut-ness… in other words… strawberry… :cough: that's my word for it…**

**BREAK**

Chapter 4: Dreams, Memories, and Countless Regrets

Naruto's eyes were now as big as saucers, yet he didn't break the kiss. Sasuke - being the more daring one - nipped at Naruto's bottom lip. Naruto was blushing so much now, that he resembled a strawberry (yes, a strawberry). Naruto was afraid that if this went any further that Sasuke wouldn't comply, so he broke the kiss and ran. Even with Sasuke's yells after him, he just kept going, and since he couldn't see nor think straight because his mind was over clouded with so many emotions, he ran into Itachi.

"Naruto-kun, what's the matter? Why are your cheeks red?" he asked with concern. Naruto just ignored him, slammed the door open, and ran all the way to he and Iruka's apartment.

When he got there, he was flushed and panting, so when Iruka opened the door from his knocking, his first thought was 'Oh no, he's sick!' Iruka grabbed Naruto, and pulled him inside (crap, this sounds like pr0n XD), stripping him of almost all of his clothes, leaving him only in his boxers.

"Naruto-kun, I think that you should lie down and r-" he didn't get to complete his sentence though because suddenly Naruto collapsed. Iruka was horror struck. "N-Naruto!" he yelled, frantically shaking Naruto's limp body. "G-get up!" Naruto didn't respond though. Iruka started to pace back and forth, worry growing inside of him. "What should I do?" he muttered to himself. "How should I help Naruto-kun?"

**BREAK-NESS**

_"Naruto, how did you like it?"_

"What? How did I like what?"

"Was it enjoyable for you?"

"Huh? Was what enjoyable for me?"

"Don't play dumb, Dobe. You know what I'm talking about."

Sasuke…

Why is Sasuke here?

"Naruto…"

A soft kiss was planted on his lips.

"How did you like it?"

"S-Sasuke, I… I have no idea what you're talking about…"

"No idea? So, you're saying that you don't know what this is?"

Suddenly, a jolt of pleasure was sent down his spine and all he saw were stars.

"A-Ah, Sasuke!"

Sasuke was smirking, now.

"See, Dobe, you know exactly what I'm talking about…"

Sasuke…  


**B-B-BREAK**

Naruto jolted awake, panting and sweating all over. He glanced around the room, but Sasuke was nowhere to be seen. He could only come to one conclusion, it was just a dream. 'A pretty damn realistic dream', he added as an afterthought. Looking down, he noticed that he was in his own bed. 'When did I…?'

Iruka's voice was heard from the doorway. "Naruto, you're awake! You had me worried sick!"

"What? Iruka, what are you talking about?" Naruto asked, confusion clearly evident in his voice.

"Naruto, you… you passed out," Iruka replied, staring at the floor sullenly. "If not for your heartbeat, I would've though that you'd been dead…"

Everything came flooding back to him. Visiting Sasuke, their shared kiss, running home, _everything_. "Oh. Well, I'm sorry that I worried you," a different tone was in Naruto's voice. Regret. Naruto hoped that Iruka didn't catch onto it, but he did.

"Don't be sorry, Naruto-kun. I know that you couldn't have helped it."

Naruto now looked up to gaze at Iruka, "Iruka… if I… if I hadn't had…"

Iruka walked over to the bed, and sat down on it, near him. "Naruto, you didn't do anything wrong, so stop blaming yourself," Iruka said, meeting Naruto's gaze.

"But if I didn't te-" He was cut off by a finger on his lips.

"Hush, Naruto. You need more rest, so stop blaming yourself about things that aren't your fault and go back to sleep." Naruto didn't say another word. He just stared into Iruka's eyes. He could tell that Iruka was serious, and he didn't want to have to deal with him.

Iruka moved his finger away from Naruto's lips, got off of the bed, and walked back to the door. "Naruto, please don't worry me like that again, though." Naruto nodded even though Iruka couldn't see it. Naruto snuggled into the covers as Iruka left the room. As he drifted back to sleep, his only thought was _'Sasuke…'._

**BREAK!**

'Sasuke has been pacing back and forth for a while now,' Itachi thought, as he watched his brother pace. Sighing, he put his hand on Sasuke's shoulder, causing him to stop mid-stride.

"Sasuke, relax," Itachi said in a stern voice. Sasuke just glanced at him, and then continued pacing.

"I can't."

Itachi looked at him in disbelief. "What do you mean that you can't?"

Sasuke glared at Itachi, yet he was unfazed. "I mean that as long as I don't know how Naruto is, I won't be able to relax at all."

"He'll be fine," Itachi replied, not too sure of his words though.

"How would you know?" Sasuke shouted.

"Sasuke, trust me," Itachi's tone became serious.

"But, you aren't him. You wouldn't know…" Sasuke trailed off.

This time Itachi's tone was playful and he smirked, "You really care for Naruto-chan, don't you?"

All Sasuke could do was sigh and reply with a "Yes, quite a lot, too."

**OKAY, STOP BREAKING!**

Kairee: Omg, did I actually write something angst-y! Whoa… that's really odd of me. :shrug: Oh well, though. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, even though it was kind of…blah. Mehh, anyway, review please:smile: Oh, and we'll give out lollipops if you do! It's our way of saying thanks! Yeah, so if you review, you get a lollipop shaped like…Naruto in his boxers! XD

Naruto: What! Why can't it be Sasuke in _his _boxers!

Kairee: 'Cause I already got them made :waves lollipop:

Naruto: Maan, ya'll are so not fair to me!

Kairee: If you shut up I'll… :whispers something in Naruto's ear:

Naruto: Really! As much as I want!

Kairee: Yes, now shut up!

Naruto: Okay:fox-like grin:

Kairee: Thank you! Oh, yeah, just review please!


	5. Fluff, Fluff, FLUUUFF!

**How Bizarre**

**xx strawberrylube xx**

**Quelzy-chaaan- **Hey, Peoples! Chapter 5 right hereeee! YOU JEALOUS! XD Okay. Lessee...LOLLIPOPS! …No lollipops…'cause everyone sucks…GAH, and 'cause whatever:huff: whatever. Chapter 5. Startin' now. Right now. No mores stallin'-ez. Y-y-y-up. WOO!

**Disclaimer: **Disclaimer-ness. Don't own. The end. FIN! XDD

**BREAK­­­­**

Sasuke began pacing again, mumbling incoherent words over and over (over and over. over and over.)

Itachi asked politely, "Hey, you want something while you figure out what you're gunna do?"

Sasuke snapped back, "No! I want…" He paused, "I want some air…I'll be right back."

"Sure…How long is 'right back'?"

"Until I come back, baka. Bye."

**Iruka's apartment**

"Nugh…," Naruto sighed lightly, sitting up, "What the hell? Ugh, my head…" Putting a hand to his head, he felt a large bump. "Owww! What the- oh…" Remembering Sasuke hurt - emotionally and to his head.

He heard bustling coming up the stairs and soon saw a happy Iruka hovering over his bed.

"Naruto, you're up again, good! You…have a visitor…" he said slowly.

Behind Iruka sensei was Sasuke with a look of boredom, but a faint hint of worry.

"S-Sasuke…," he began, and then shrieked, "IRUKA! I'M NAKED!"

Sasuke smirked and covered his eyes with his hand with spaced fingers to see out. "Don't worry, I won't look."

Iruka looked at Naruto then Sasuke and sighed. "Naruto, you're not naked and I'll get you some clothes. Sasuke, if you don't mind to just wait outside the door, I'll..."

Naruto said quickly and looked over to the older boy, "No, he's fine. I mean, we're both guys, right?"

Sasuke looked over at Naruto, then to the ground. "Naruto...I have to tell you this...I'm a lady..."

Naruto shrieked. "WHAT?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "No, dobe, I have a penis, thank you"

"Oh…damn…"

Sasuke smirked and gripped Naruto's shoulders and pushed him back. Straddling him, he dipped his head down to capture Naruto's lips with his own, placing one hand on Naruto's bare hip. Just as their lips touched, Iruka appeared in the doorway.

"I brought you two cookies and milk!" he exclaimed with a smile on his face.

Sasuke swung his leg over off of Naruto and brushed by Iruka as if nothing happened.

**BREAK**

Sasuke fled down the stairs and buried himself into a pillow on a nearby couch. "DAMMIT, I lost my CHANCE!" Sasuke burned to himself, hot tears threatening to flow from his eyes –all anime-y! XD-. "Ugh…," he groaned, picking up his cell phone.

**BREAK**

_**Kuwaii! … Kuwaii! … Kuwaii!**_

Itachi looked over to his cell phone and saw **U. SASUKE** displayed clearly across the screen.

_**Kuwa-**_

"Hey, Sasu-chan! What's up?"

"_Hey…what are you doing?"_

"Ah, I'm over at Kankuro's place!"

"_Who?"_

"…Oh, yeah…Kankuro is this guy I met over at this pier a bit ago…Way awesome!" he said giving Kankuro a thumbs-up. "Anyway, you didn't call for small talk, so what's up?"

"…_Can you pick me up? …I'm over at Naruto's place…"_

"Yeah…yeah…I'll be there in a sec."

"_Thanks…"_

Itachi hung up and placed his phone in his back pocket. "Well, I gotta go save Sasuke from Naruto…or something…Anyway, I'll bring him back here so Gaara 'm' him can meet and yeah…'Be back A-SAP!"

Kankuro waved as Itachi fled out the door and into his Jet-black Mustang and pulled out of the drive-way.

**STOP TEH BREAKING-NESS!**

**Q:** :like Kairee: Ooh, yeahh! XD terribly sorry 'bout the MAJOR sucky-nesses and yeah…uhm…yeah…REVIEW! NO FLAMES! I LOVE YOU! XDD Reviewers get a free pr0n vid. Starring…GAARA! XDD YAY:hugs nearby tree: yeah…uhm...REVIEW! I LOVE YOU PEOPLES! PEACE LIKE THE HIPPIEZ!

:Like Barney: Until next time, remember, I love you!

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